I've stopped counting.

I think I've hit the five or six month mark (24 weeks by January 7). There's been improvement in my knee (such as being able to climb stairs without wincing at the end of the day), but I think that my lack of physical therapy (and physical ANYTHING in general) is causing a minor setback. I was supposed to get fitted for a knee brace (the kind that provide a security blanket for you when working out) in mid-December, but my health insurance stopped covering me for that month. So, I moved all my appointments to January, but if my union screws me again and I end up not having health insurance, then I have to wait until February to start do cutting and pivoting exercises. What's worse is that I'd been so busy during the holidays that I didn't make time to work out. I think I've started to lose muscle mass again in my quad and that does not make for good further ACL recovery.

And there's still the swelling in my knee. My surgeon told me that it goes away after 9 months, but I'd love to see it go away now. I'm tired of the feeling of needing to crack my knee, the random popping noises, etc. I know that it's normal (for now), but I can't help feeling frustrated. I suppose it's normal when you can't do much about the stuff going on underneath the skin.

I've decided to get back into shape again (since I let myself go pretty badly this semester - full-time MBA program + working 2 jobs does not make for a good schedule to work out). My friend Melissa and I have made a pact to go to the gym together at least twice a week this month to get back into the swing of things, and eventually going five times a week once we are in shape. Workout buddies are great - it's much easier to motivate myself to go work out when you know you can't keep someone waiting.

These past two weeks I've just been doing calisthenics to get some physical activity into my day. I've maintained my knee exercises and stretching, and added pushups, situps, back extensions, and good mornings (all without weights). My surgeon has told me that I can do straight-line running, so that's next on the agenda when Mel and I begin our gym sessions next week. I've already seen improvement in my energy levels and mood, and I can't wait to keep this going.

Here's to a better year, and to a full recovery! For all those people out there who've torn their ACLs, I wish you luck in your surgery and recovery processes.

Happy (belated) new year!

Week 18. 4.5 months post-op.

The only times I think about my knee now are when I've been sitting down for 3 hours without a break during class and suddenly have to stand up (there's that feeling of instability when I first stand up); when I climb the stairs at the end of the day to my apartment and my knee just doesn't want to cooperate; and after I've been standing for 2 hours at my night job and my knee locks up.

I love that I can sit Indian-style again. I love that I can walk normally again.

My PT sessions have been cut short by my insurance company. I've been doing my exercises on my own at the gym anyway, which is helping to add muscle to my quad. In January I can get fitted for a brace for my knee to start doing cutting and pivoting exercises.

I also learned that I have patellar tendonitis (aka jumper's knee). My PT said that it was common in a lot of women recovering from ACL surgery since the kneecap moves around so much afterward. She also said that it will eventually disappear, as long as I keep rolling out my IT band and doing my stretches after my exercises.

This whole knee business has been a long trial for me. It's been a blessing in disguise, since I probably wouldn't have slowed my life down, which would have left me hitting a wall much harder than I did back in June. I've learned the nuances of dealing with hospital billing, insurance billing, and referrals. I've come to understand the rules my union stipulates about health insurance coverage, and I've learned to deal with various kinds of people.

I discovered that I only lose insurance coverage for a month (December). I could either choose to pay the $1,009 to maintain my health benefits under COBRA, or I could just wait it out and not incur any charges til January when I get reinstated. I chose the latter decision - as long as I don't get sick or hurt or need a doctor's appointment, I should be scot-free. However, the challenge is maintaining my health for 31 days . . . I think I can do it. :)

Every time I hear about someone else's knee pain, I have knee sympathy. I no longer feel invincible anymore - I knew that would come in time, but I never expected it this early in life.

Hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving holiday!

Week 9

Yesterday was week 9. I visited my surgeon/doctor on Monday and yesterday was my 15th physical therapy visit.

My doctor was quite pleased with my progress and laid out a general schedule for me in terms of being able to run and start doing pivot sports again. At the three-month mark I can start really running again and by five months I have to get fitted for a knee brace to do pivoting. That's a relief that I can do all this.

My biggest worry at this point is that my benefits aren't going to cover me that far in. I'm still trying to get answers from my Union and from HR regarding what I'm going to have to do about that. I really can't afford $1,000-a-month payments under the COBRA stipulation - if it comes to that, I might as well quit school and go find a day job that offers me benefits. According to my Union records, it seems that my benefits are paid through until November, but I have no idea what that means for me in terms of how I will pay for coverage. I'm anxious and scared of what is to come and I have no way of controlling the future. I'm forcing myself to go back to my night job as early as next week if I can fit it. Major :-(

In other news, this was my regimen yesterday:

- heat (without stim!!!): 10 min
- massage
- elliptical: 10 min with resistance
- squats: 3 x 15
- front step downs: 3 x 15 at 8"
- lateral step downs: 3 x 15 at 8"
- front step ups: 3 x 15 x 8"
- leg extensions: 3 x 15 x 1st weight setting
- leg press: 3 x 15 x 7th weight setting
- leg press with left leg: 3 x 15 x 4th weight setting
- balancing exercise (one foot balancing while catching a ball): 2 x 30 seconds
- straight leg lifts: 3 x 15 x 4lb
- hamstring curls: 3 x 15 x 2lb
- stretching
- Game Ready icing (without stim!!!): 10 min

I've graduated from the stationary bike and the electric stimulation! It's so great to actually be able to do my exercises and know that my leg is much stronger.

I have a 3-month follow-up with my doctor in a few weeks, and I have to get another referral for more physical therapy. Oy, I hate health insurance stipulations, especially being a part of an HMO (despite how cheap they are).